COMPROMISE
An ageing couple, having been together for so many years, is often asked “What is your secret to such a long marriage”? One of them usually answers “No secret, just compromise”, and they smile. They remember how many times they compromised about issues over the years. Big ones, small ones but always important at the time. Each issue could be capable of breaking the marriage if they didn’t – together – reach an agreement, and once reached, live up to it, working hard until this particular issue could be called resolved. It was the law. Oh, there were arguments, there were tears, especially if it was a subject on which they couldn’t easily reach an agreement. Remember the old saying “Never go to bed mad”? That should be such an easy one but sometimes, in their case, come bed time, she would still be fuming and he would kiss her goodnight (or try to) and then roll over and go to sleep! Sometimes he was lucky to wake up alive! When he inevitably did, it was always cheerfully as if nothing had happened She couldn’t live with her continuing animosity, so they compromised. Other times, after a rather heated discussion over a decision, perhaps regarding one of the children, he would finally say “Okay, you win”. In her mind that kind of win was not acceptable so it was time to discuss some more. This often lasted for quite a long time but in the long run it usually came back to old faithful – compromise. In this scenario it usually resulted in a compromise between the child and the parents.
There is much more to a lasting marriage in this union of two people. It takes hard work, a lot of laughter and mutual respect.
Oh, I almost forgot, they tell me that there has to be a lasting love involved in this process and the very best thing? the relationship keeps on improving as they get more practice.
Kathleen
April 30, 2008
