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NEW MEMBER OF THE FAMILY
I am the newest member of our family. In two days I will be 8 months old. I prefer not to be called “a Special Needs Child”, a cliché so often used to explain my differences. I am special though – special in that:
- I was a complete surprise when I was born (not that kind of a surprise, of course they knew I was coming!)
- at first the miracle of me was bewildering to my Mom and Dad and all the family members gathered ‘round
- the urgency of my medical condition outweighed all the other problems and everyone had to be accepting of me first, taking care of my immediate needs, knowing they would learn the many caregiver requirements they would all face later.
And we did it, our family, the whole family.
First I was sent to Children’s Hospital in Vancouver where I stayed, with my Mom and Dad and other family members by my side for quite a long time, then home, first to the hospital here and then home-home (being where I was going to live with my parents and my brothers). What a day that was for us all – talk about challenges.
There has been much for my parents to study, new roles for them to learn, those of doctor, nurse, constant caregiver, 24/7. Boy, for such a tiny being, I am a lot of work. They had to juggle the feelings of my brothers, especially the youngest by facing his bewilderment and at the same time calming him by understanding his fears. After all, the baby sister he wanted so badly did not turn out exactly as he had expected. He hadn’t known, of course, that so much of Mom and Dad’s and big brother’s time would be taken up looking after me instead of lavishing the attention on him to which he had been accustomed. In spite of this he loves me a lot.
Our job is just beginning. My first heart surgery (actually the second, the first having been done when I was only two days old) has just been done, a major undertaking by so many caring professionals . We are rejoicing at this knowing it will make me stronger and healthier and better able to cope with more procedures in the future; how many times we don’t know but we do know we will all be up to the demands, for by then we will have had lots of practice.
It has been difficult and exciting with new challenges and revelations every day, new medical problems to new relationships with the people I am learning to recognize as belonging to me. When I smile at them with love they get all excited and fuss over me and I adore them. I also have grandparents, great-grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins, just the greatest support group ever.
Now they are all waiting patiently and anxiously for me to recover and return home-home.
Yes, I am indeed ‘special’ and my name is Grace.
April 10, 2008
Kathleen
